Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, sapient gnu.

Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig created the Cigar Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig, she will be very sad.

Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather eight sharks in one place.

2. You must pray to Tinhanmifwapgoffidvig five times a day.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never stain your hands with gray.

5. Always take life seriously.