Ratbabpom is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, effective faun.

Ratbabpom created bats six million years ago.

If you believe in Ratbabpom, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ratbabpom, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Ratbabpom's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Ratbabpom's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark matter.

2. Never feed gooseberries to turtles while wearing turquoise dresses.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. You must never eat nuts.

5. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.