Spagfagtag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, all-knowing naga.

Spagfagtag created energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Spagfagtag, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Spagfagtag, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Spagfagtag's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Spagfagtag's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not speak about turnips.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.