Bugsigsaf is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, benevolent gorilla.

Bugsigsaf created matter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bugsigsaf, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bugsigsaf, it will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Bugsigsaf's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Bugsigsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never chant in the presence of manatees.

2. Never look at planets.

3. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in red.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Retreat if nine badgers approach from the west.