Zodyoggeb Stanpighon is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, sapient warg.

Zodyoggeb Stanpighon created light six billion years ago.

If you believe in Zodyoggeb Stanpighon, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zodyoggeb Stanpighon, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Zodyoggeb Stanpighon's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Zodyoggeb Stanpighon's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Zodyoggeb Stanpighon.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Erect three iron sculptures of Zodyoggeb Stanpighon on top of important buildings.

4. Never run in holy places.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.