Quarttunwit is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, ruthless bee.

Quarttunwit created the planet Earth seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quarttunwit, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Quarttunwit, it will be very sad.

Quarttunwit's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Quarttunwit's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never look in ponds.