Futcissont is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, overgenerous bat.

Futcissont created the world three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Futcissont, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Futcissont, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Futcissont's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Futcissont's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Erect a large tin sculpture of Futcissont on top of all buildings.

3. Never hurt ducks.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never talk about quantum mechanics.