Bimziddag is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, two-faced giraffe.

Bimziddag created water eight million years ago.

If you believe in Bimziddag, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Bimziddag, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bimziddag's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Bimziddag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Never think ill of sick pigs.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always help sick foxes.