Timstanomt is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, fast bat.

Timstanomt created the cosmos four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Timstanomt, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Timstanomt, she will turn you into a plant.

Timstanomt's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Timstanomt's Holy Commandments

1. Learn five new languages a year.

2. Tortoises are not to be trusted.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Timstanomt.