Farstafduss is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, staggering pig.

Farstafduss created the solar system three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Farstafduss, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Farstafduss, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Farstafduss' most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Farstafduss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never feed lots of bananas to ducks while wearing purple boots.

4. Always help badgers in need.

5. Always wash your neck before prayer.