Dinxinbog is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, staggering crocodile.

Dinxinbog created life two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dinxinbog, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dinxinbog, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Dinxinbog's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Dinxinbog's Holy Commandments

1. Never point your feet toward the west during prayer.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never wear blue shoes.

4. Do not take Dinxinbog's name in vain.

5. Learn three new languages a year.