Kemtimhun Stragcudfod is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unselfish crab.

Kemtimhun Stragcudfod created dark energy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kemtimhun Stragcudfod, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kemtimhun Stragcudfod, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Kemtimhun Stragcudfod's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Kemtimhun Stragcudfod's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no great tits in a room before entering it.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. You must never eat pineapples.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Hide from yellow ducks for they are unholy.