Raponttig is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, narcissistic zebra.

Raponttig created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Raponttig, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Raponttig, she will think nothing of it.

Raponttig's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Raponttig's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat mites with great respect.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Learn four new languages a year.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Never play with disobedient children.