Quafbutcan is a god.

It takes the form of a small, deceitful lobster.

Quafbutcan created the planet Earth six million years ago.

If you believe in Quafbutcan, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Quafbutcan, it will turn you into a dog.

Quafbutcan's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Quafbutcan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

3. You must love Quafbutcan.

4. Never talk about black holes.

5. Do not dye your hair indigo.