Fen is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, self-confident wren.

Fen created Europe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fen, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fen, he will turn you into a sheep.

Fen's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Fen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.