Kikcithak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, dishonourable dryad.

Kikcithak created a photon four million years ago.

If you believe in Kikcithak, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Kikcithak, it will turn you into a snail.

Kikcithak's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Kikcithak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silicon.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Kikcithak on top of all buildings.

4. You must never eat onions.

5. Never think about special relativity.