Cutjabhatbell is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, charitable yak.

Cutjabhatbell created Europe four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutjabhatbell, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cutjabhatbell, he will turn you into a hamster.

Cutjabhatbell's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Cutjabhatbell's Holy Commandments

1. Cutjabhatbell must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never write about optics.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never talk about nucleic acids.

5. Never think about nebulae.