Dutlatmad is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unsympathetic mouse.

Dutlatmad created the Sun three million years ago.

If you believe in Dutlatmad, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dutlatmad, he will not invite you to parties.

Dutlatmad's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Dutlatmad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt badgers.

2. Do not wear cyan clothing.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

5. Do not wear platinum on your body.