Joprillqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, loving warg.

Joprillqueeg created a photon four billion years ago.

If you believe in Joprillqueeg, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Joprillqueeg, he will strike you with lightening.

Joprillqueeg's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Joprillqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not hurt porpoises.