Jarnarnrutlim is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, boastful wolf.

Jarnarnrutlim created snails four years ago.

If you believe in Jarnarnrutlim, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Jarnarnrutlim, he will destroy your home solar system.

Jarnarnrutlim's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Jarnarnrutlim's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Put Jarnarnrutlim first in all things.

4. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.