Dottapkop is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, moody elephant.

Dottapkop created gold eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dottapkop, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dottapkop, it will throw large rocks at you.

Dottapkop's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Dottapkop's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never eat peanuts.

3. Always obey Dottapkop's priests.

4. Do not trade with those who eat figs.

5. Never wear dresses.