Hatcepcissbemminpadbon is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, moody bat.

Hatcepcissbemminpadbon created Mount Everest two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatcepcissbemminpadbon, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Hatcepcissbemminpadbon, she will try to impress you with trees.

Hatcepcissbemminpadbon's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Hatcepcissbemminpadbon's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dogs with great respect.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never chant while facing east.

4. Never paint your legs indigo.

5. Never record secrets.