Cadsighon Didlamgumpangfemrowcid Bepjamlopmum is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, slow gorilla.

Cadsighon Didlamgumpangfemrowcid Bepjamlopmum created Africa nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cadsighon Didlamgumpangfemrowcid Bepjamlopmum, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Cadsighon Didlamgumpangfemrowcid Bepjamlopmum, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Cadsighon Didlamgumpangfemrowcid Bepjamlopmum's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Cadsighon Didlamgumpangfemrowcid Bepjamlopmum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in red rooms.

2. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near bats while wearing mauve coats and balancing four iron spheres on your neck.

3. Never feed lots of corn to hamsters while wearing indigo corsets.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.