Xenpankim is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, ill-tempered faun.

Xenpankim created Mount Everest nine million years ago.

If you believe in Xenpankim, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Xenpankim, it will turn you into a mole.

Xenpankim's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Xenpankim's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum gravity.

2. Never mix peanuts with water.

3. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Xenpankim.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.