Bosscemdib is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, merciful mole.

Bosscemdib created the Sun three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bosscemdib, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Bosscemdib, he will turn you into a dog.

Bosscemdib's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Bosscemdib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear tights marked with blue.

2. You must never eat gooseberries.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never gather eight bats in one place.