Zogbabbastdav is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, stupid snail.

Zogbabbastdav created a bottom quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zogbabbastdav, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Zogbabbastdav, it will ignore you and hope you go away.

Zogbabbastdav's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Zogbabbastdav's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak aloud of secrets.

2. Never stain your neck with orange.

3. Never talk about ducks.

4. Remain standing during prayer.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.