Dogxen Yarpfudflancetpanghignur is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, omniscient porpoise.

Dogxen Yarpfudflancetpanghignur created energy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dogxen Yarpfudflancetpanghignur, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Dogxen Yarpfudflancetpanghignur, she will turn you into a dog.

Dogxen Yarpfudflancetpanghignur's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Dogxen Yarpfudflancetpanghignur's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near aardvarks while wearing gray stockings and balancing six carbon spheres on your legs.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never write about solid mechanics.