Yattcetflan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, self-confident human.

Yattcetflan created the planet Jupiter five million years ago.

If you believe in Yattcetflan, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yattcetflan, he will curse you with boils.

Yattcetflan's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Yattcetflan's Holy Commandments

1. Never touch water while unclean.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always keep your back turned to the north at sunset.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never look in ponds.