Safcapgudneg is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, intelligent centaur.

Safcapgudneg created Africa two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Safcapgudneg, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Safcapgudneg, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Safcapgudneg's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Safcapgudneg's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Always wear red.

4. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Safcapgudneg in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not make images of living things.