Misdimgon is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, loving bear.

Misdimgon created dark energy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Misdimgon, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Misdimgon, he will turn you into a puffin.

Misdimgon's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Misdimgon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

3. Never think about gravity near voles while wearing orange coats and balancing five titanium spheres on your back.

4. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Misdimgon in the centre of the settlement.

5. Learn six new languages a year.