Boncam is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, moody hyena.

Boncam created an atom six million years ago.

If you believe in Boncam, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Boncam, she will strike you with lightening.

Boncam's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Boncam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick great tits.

2. Never go into indigo rooms.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.

5. Never prepare apples during spring.