Nurlzenneg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, witty parrot.

Nurlzenneg created the Sol system seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlzenneg, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Nurlzenneg, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Nurlzenneg's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Nurlzenneg's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear stockings.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Always pray immersed in water.