Flankapjam is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, awesome crane.

Flankapjam created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Flankapjam, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Flankapjam, she will try to impress you with trees.

Flankapjam's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Flankapjam's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six titanium sculptures of Flankapjam on top of important buildings.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not wear brown clothing.

4. You must love Flankapjam.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.