Yartcutveg is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, resourceful gnu.

Yartcutveg created the Virgo Supercluster three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yartcutveg, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Yartcutveg, she will think nothing of it.

Yartcutveg's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Yartcutveg's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about planets.

2. Never talk about quantum mechanics near birds while wearing white shorts and balancing five lead spheres on your back.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate dolphins.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

5. Do not shave your feet.