Cinrillbam is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, awesome clam.

Cinrillbam created light three billion years ago.

If you believe in Cinrillbam, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cinrillbam, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Cinrillbam's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Cinrillbam's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Cinrillbam's priests.

2. Never talk about dwarf planets.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never write about enzymes.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.