Fombepcum is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, almighty lizard.

Fombepcum created humankind two million years ago.

If you believe in Fombepcum, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fombepcum, it will laugh at you.

Fombepcum's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Fombepcum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant zinc sculpture of Fombepcum in the centre of the settlement.

2. You must never eat lentils.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Put Fombepcum first in all things.

5. Always help rats.