Higbarnbastzim is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, proud octopus.

Higbarnbastzim created Africa seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Higbarnbastzim, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Higbarnbastzim, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Higbarnbastzim's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Higbarnbastzim's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from fawn mites for they are unholy.

2. Run away if eight moths approach from the north.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never go into magenta rooms.