Pibtifligbanyattjarn is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, annoying yak.

Pibtifligbanyattjarn created energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Pibtifligbanyattjarn, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Pibtifligbanyattjarn, she will turn you into a plant.

Pibtifligbanyattjarn's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Pibtifligbanyattjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force near nematodes while wearing pink shorts and balancing nine aluminium spheres on your hands.

2. Do not keep six snakes in a large pit.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never look at comets.