Genyakhen is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, awe-inspiring giraffe.

Genyakhen created the Virgo Supercluster seven million years ago.

If you believe in Genyakhen, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Genyakhen, it will turn you into a rat.

Genyakhen's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Genyakhen's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat aubergines on days of mourning.

2. Never feed lots of coconuts to turtles while wearing mauve rings.

3. Never gather seven sheep near walls.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. You must love Genyakhen.