Xemfablun is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, staggering spider.

Xemfablun created the Whirlpool Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Xemfablun, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Xemfablun, it will destroy your favourite star.

Xemfablun's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Xemfablun's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Put Xemfablun first in all things.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Run away if five turtles approach from the north.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.