Dudyartom is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, idiotic bee.

Dudyartom created gold four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dudyartom, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dudyartom, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Dudyartom's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Dudyartom's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never go into green rooms.

3. Run away if four turtles approach from the north.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dudyartom.