Kimsoggov is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, emotional dolphin.

Kimsoggov created water six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimsoggov, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kimsoggov, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Kimsoggov's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Kimsoggov's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

2. Always help moths.

3. Kimsoggov loves swans, so they must be respected.

4. Kimsoggov loves bats, so they must be honoured.

5. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Kimsoggov in the centre of the settlement.