Nilgarpag Dogcisslen is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, narcissistic chinchilla.

Nilgarpag Dogcisslen created humanity twelve years ago.

If you believe in Nilgarpag Dogcisslen, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Nilgarpag Dogcisslen, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Nilgarpag Dogcisslen's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Nilgarpag Dogcisslen's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Do not bounce at mountains.

3. Pray only in moonlight.

4. Never adorn your arms with yellow markings.

5. Always wear blue.