Flansidapp is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, prudent snake.

Flansidapp created bats nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flansidapp, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Flansidapp, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Flansidapp's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Flansidapp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your hands.

2. Do not hurt dogs.

3. Run away if nine nematodes approach from the north.

4. Pray only in firelight.

5. You must love Flansidapp.