Gebfitvonk is a god.

He takes the form of a large, all-powerful dove.

Gebfitvonk created a top quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gebfitvonk, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gebfitvonk, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Gebfitvonk's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Gebfitvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse oil with water.

2. Do not speak of thermodynamics near sacred fires.

3. Do not take Gebfitvonk's name in vain.

4. Always obey Gebfitvonk's priests.

5. Never mix pineapples with ash.