Gemlendud is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, witty elephant.

Gemlendud created a top quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gemlendud, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Gemlendud, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Gemlendud's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Gemlendud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Put Gemlendud first in all things.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never point your hands toward the east during prayer.