Stanmapgid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, all-powerful yak.

Stanmapgid created a Higgs boson five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stanmapgid, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Stanmapgid, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Stanmapgid's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Stanmapgid's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick tortoises.

2. Stanmapgid loves bats, so they must be respected.

3. Do not keep three mice in a large pit.

4. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.

5. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.