Tettidissgil is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, awe-inspiring hydra.

Tettidissgil created humanity five billion years ago.

If you believe in Tettidissgil, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tettidissgil, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Tettidissgil's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Tettidissgil's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat tapirs with great respect.

2. Never feed pineapples to cats while wearing boots.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

5. You must pray to Tettidissgil nine times a day.