Ladstragkonlist is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, grumpy slug.

Ladstragkonlist created the world four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ladstragkonlist, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Ladstragkonlist, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Ladstragkonlist's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Ladstragkonlist's Holy Commandments

1. Always help geese in need.

2. You must never eat lentils.

3. Never speak aloud of signs.

4. Never mark doors with purple.

5. Ladstragkonlist must be the most important thing in your life.