Larnsterripdotfub is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, temperamental dugong.

Larnsterripdotfub created snails nine million years ago.

If you believe in Larnsterripdotfub, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Larnsterripdotfub, she will not care.

Larnsterripdotfub's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Larnsterripdotfub's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Larnsterripdotfub on top of all buildings.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never write about galaxies.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

5. Larnsterripdotfub must be the most important thing in your life.